Web41Forever

It's the second thursday of the month. Or, rather, it was yeterday.

For whatever reason, my watch reminded me that today is the second Thursday of the month. That doesn't seem that unusual, right? Every month has a second Thursday, absolutely every month does.

But what was weird, at least for me, was that the reason my watch was reminding me of that was that tonight will be. A Web414 night. And that's weird because in the last 16 years, since Web414 stopped being a thing, I don't think I've ever gotten that message before. Web414was an important thing, and it happened pretty regularly on the second Thursday of every month. But it seems really strange that it would show up in my calendar this month for some reason.

Consider this post a back-door pilot for both the never going to happen Web41Forever Podcast and the “GabeFull” Podcast. I’m not making promises, but I do like to post things sometimes.

The Parable of the Fart Suckers

The problem, it would seem, is that everybody has their own heads up their own ass. And that’s bad for them. Especially when they forget about it. And then they try to breathe, and then end up sucking in their own farts and colon and turning themselves inside out. 
And that’s gross. And it’s embarrassing for them, so they just don’t talk about it.

Think about it. You got all these inside out people walking around with their insides tucked in and around and pulled outside in and inside out pretending that there is nothing at all wrong with them. They’re just cold and uncomfortable and have horrible breath. 

But they know. They know there is something wrong with them. They just got a mouth full of their own farts. Of course they know. And of course they don’t want to talk about it. 

But that would be bad enough, I guess. But it is a fartsucker’s nature to suck farts, I guess. 

These fart suckers are walking around out there, with their insides getting cold and their outsides getting warm, and they forget that there was ever another way. They go around and they see one or two people who either have never put their own head up their own ass, or -worse- they see people who remembered to pull their heads out of their asses before they took a deep breath. And they see these people who are not inside out fart suckers and they get snippy about it.  

"How come he doesn't have his outside on the in and his inside on the outside,” the bicker at one another. “Must be nice not to have a mouth-full of farts,” they say, forgetting entirely that it was they who put their own heads up their asses in the first place. 

So, anyway, if having a mouthful of your own farts and your asshole on the outside and your inside in your asshole is the new normal. I’m not having it. Get off my lawn.